I read a quote the other day that says something along the lines of, “External circumstances do not create how you feel. How you feel creates external circumstances. Let me give you an example, if you think that being a smaller size, more money, or anything else will make you happy, you’re wrong. When you become happy, you are then able to create whatever it is you want.
Have you ever tried to do a maze and you kept getting stuck and couldn’t find the way through? Then after some frustration you start from the end and you’re easily able to get right through on the first try? So why not take the logic of starting a maze backwards? Why not imagine that you are already confident and happy? I read a study that had someone go out in a busy area, like a bookshop or coffee shop, and they just walked around and thought negatively of themselves. They would tell themselves that they were dumb, fat, ugly, or any other negative thing and it was as if people could feel the negativity and would stay away from the person. The very next day the same person went to the same place thinking positive thoughts. They told themselves that they were amazing, that people like them, and other kind things and people were drawn to this person.
The next time you go out, even if it’s to the grocery store, try it. Tell yourself all the wonderful things that make you great and see what happens. I really like to do this if I’m going somewhere that I might have the tendency to feel insecure. When I practice this I show up confident and usually end up having a better time.