This last week my father in law passed away. He was a great man. He adored his wife and loved his children and grandchildren. He was a hard worker and quick with a joke, most likely an inappropriate joke. He passed this trait onto my husband. Anyway, his health has not been great for a while. In one year he had his hips replaced, a shoulder replaced, hernia, and prostate cancer. After he recovered from that he fell and had to have brain surgery. He never fully recovered from that, but was still able to get around. Then earlier this year his blood pressure sky rocketed and tore a hole in his heart. He never recovered from that and slowly his health continued to decline until he passed away.
This was a man who lived a good, full life. He was in pain and his passing relieved him of that pain, but we are all experiencing grief. And guess what, it’s ok.
How long should one feel grief? As long as it takes for them to heal. For some, they may feel grief for a few days, others a few years. There is no right or wrong answer.
I talked to a friend the other day who was sad. Her child made some decisions that will now affect the rest of his life. She is studying how to be truly happy, but was confused with this area. She’s sad. She’s mourning that her child cannot do certain things that she would have loved for him to do. She then felt guilty that she felt sad because we should all be happy all the time right?
That would be awesome, but no. Life can be tricky at times and it is absolutely fine to feel some sadness and grief at times. At some point, you do have to move on so that you can feel joy. Some circumstances, like death, may take a little longer to heal, but I promise you that the sooner you’re able to feel joy again and heal the happier your life will be.