I thought it would be a great idea to let you know how my 14 Days of Love Challenge went. No joke, it was AMAZING!! My husband loved it and it completely shifted my thinking for the past 14 days. Instead of thoughts like, "What is he going to do for me?" I was having thoughts like, "What can I do for him?"
On Valentine's night we ended up going to an NBA game. I know that's probably not the most romantic idea for most people, but it was great because we were doing something that he loves. I had the same excitement for Valentine's as you do on Christmas Eve, well maybe not the same, but the idea that I'm so excited to give someone something that I know they really love.
So here is my confession. I was very clear that you had to have no expectations throughout the 14 days. That you were just going to show up, love your husband, and not worry about yourself. I did really great with this except on one of the nights. It was the night that you take your husband out and do something he wants to do. I wanted to take him to his favorite restaurant and then go to a shooting range. Well, our older kids all had plans that night, so nobody could watch the baby for very long. We were able to go to dinner, but it wasn't the place that I wanted to take him to (even though it was still really good) and then we had to hurry back home. There was an NBA game on, so instead of watching a movie together he wanted to watch the game.
I was kind of bugged. I ended up going into our room and just read. My amazing night that I had planned was completely ruined, or so I thought. Luckily, I did my own thought work before I got upset with him and realized that he had a fantastic night.
Someone had given us a gift card to the other restaurant, so it was way cheaper, and he got to watch basketball with our little boys, who LOVE basketball as much as he does. He had a great night, which was the whole goal of the challenge. It was only my negative thoughts about the night that said it was lame.
I jokingly told my husband that now that the challenge is over I can be mean to him. :) But seriously, it shifted my paradigm on our relationship. By focusing on him I felt more at peace than when I worry about me. Although I won't have specific things that I'll be doing for him each day this challenge has made me want to focus more on him, something that I plan to keep on doing.